Fire walk with me – first thoughts written down, my impressions of Twin Peaks

I was busy procrastinating the past week, so I ended up watching the most briliant TV show I have ever watched in my twenty one years of existence. Previously, I was drawn to Breaking Bad, at the age of 16 when I watched the series, then towards the end of high school – when I was around 17, I thought Dark is the best TV show there is. Funnily enough, I thought Game of Thrones was amazing (despite its horrible ending) when I was 15. And then, I remembered an amazing film I saw when I was 17 – Mulholland Drive – I didn't quite grasp any of it. And so I remembered his name. David Lynch. A goddamn genius. 

The thing is, when you become isolated in this world, when you start forgetting if you were dreaming or if it was real, when with each passing day your own morals, thoughts, opinions become so mushy that nothing holds meaning anymore – you find him. Generally speaking, the past few months have been months of repressed feelings, non-spoken emotions and confusion about what the future holds. 

Twin Peaks is a surrealist mystery-horror drama, or whatever wikipedia says. It made me happy to see that the release date – April 8th (1990), is in fact my birthday. Twin Peaks character Special Agent Dale Cooper is my favorite fictional character, I have never previously had a favorite fictional character, simply because I have never seen someone in a TV show being so pure, kind and good. Credits to Albert too, surely his quotes throughout the show speak volumes: "I pride myself in taking a punch and I'll gladly take another because I choose to live my life in the company of Gandhi and King. My concerns are global. I reject absolutely revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method... is love."

One can never fully grasp Twin Peaks, and a voice inside me tells me that even David Lynch and Mark Frost – the minds behind the show – at times did not understand fully what they were creating, even if they understood how much mystery and greatness it connected. I think this way simoly because the human mind, as amazing as it is, is still the human mind. Limited in its capacity, incapable of transcdending the border between the reality and dreams – both creations of our own brains. 

With that being said, I should say that this by no means is an analysis behind the symbolism of Twin Peaks, nor a comprehensive review of its plot, why it's so amazing, etc. Rather, I would like to mention the two things that are stuck in my mind like gelatin. First, the horrors of being a girl in this world that was molested and abused, that unfolding to how women in general are being abused in all history and across all parts of the world. What happens to the girl that's pretty and magnetic? Second, the concept of fear and love being the doors to the Black and White lodges. Some spoilers ahead, beware! 

Firstly, I had an odd morning today as I started my day by watching Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, watching the story of Laura Palmer seven days prior to her murder by her own father. You think her father was possessed by the evil, who takes the form of a skinny, old man with long, grey hair. He is named Bob. Laura was being molested by her own father since the age of 12, although her own brain did not accept this as a way to cope with the trauma. She was seeing this strange man – Bob, instead of her father, come through the window to her room at nights. As her dad was killing her, said, "I thought you knew it was me all along", Bob says "I never knew you knew it was me!". The question here is not even whether Bob is real or not, but what happens when you close the screen and take a look at this world you live in. Why does it seem to me that most men hate women? The odd morning that started with a gut-wrenching film was followed by some 15 minutes of tiktok scrolling about women in Afghanistan. I watched a few clips from interviews, news reports from "credible" western sources, and no matter where you look for information, those women in Afghanistan are being treated in ways that no human should ever be treated like. "A bird can sing in Kabul, but a girl may not speak in public". This is exactly a representation of a world that failed women. They even cover faces of mannequins in that country. No voices, no eyes, nothing. Women have become nothing but a machine inside a household. And all the domestic abuse all around the world, all the cases of rape and sexual assault, all the cases when a father does that to his own daughter... In this world, it always baffled me how much evil there is in men, for hating the very creature that brought them into this world, that gave them birth. "Maybe that's all BOB is. The evil that men do." 

By no means I am saying that evil is only inherent in men and not women, nor am I saying all men are evil. One shall hope this world has good people in it. At least, if you are trying to be good then that's all the proof you need to show that evil is not inherent in humanity and people around are usually good, most of the time at least. 

And Laura Palmer, the beautiful girl that was murdered... What does it mean to be a beautiful girl leading a double life, abusing drugs and alcohol, having sexual intercourse actively with a few people? What about the other pretty girls in the show, Miss Twin Peaks? The designated last murder. That is a question I am not comfortable with answering, so I leave it up for your interpretation, dear internet people. 

And secondly, fear and love. One might say, in Christian thought, Adam and Eve originally lived in perfect trust and communion with God, free from fear. After eating the apple, they experienced what many theologians call “animalistic fear”, a sudden shift into shame, self-protection, and the instinct to hide from God. This fear became the mark of the fallen human condition, replacing openness with distrust. Christianity teaches that salvation is the undoing of this fear; “perfect love casts out fear,” and love becomes the only path back to the original harmony humanity had with God. Through love, the human heart returns to its natural state – fearless, open, and capable of God.

How this idea is connected to the doors of the White and Black Lodges, seems to be obvious. When Major Briggs remembers his appearance in the White Lodge, strangely enough it looks like a garden. Yet, so many times throughout the show you come to realize that the White Lodge and the Black Lodge are the same thing. "One and... The same". Of course there are many symbols throughout that point towards this idea of them being the same. In any case, I do not think that White and Black Lodge could be interpreted as simply as heaven or as hell, somehow, I also think exactly they can be interpreted as simple as that. This thought will dwell in my mind for many days to come, and I am not yet ready to interpret big ideas as the fear and love that each human being contains. World is full of fear and love. 

I hope you watch Twin Peaks.